You know, it took me a year to realize that I've become "one of those moms". I guess that term could mean a lot, but here it means "a mom who doesn't get dressed, goes everywhere looking like a hobo, cut her hair off crazily short and rocks the mom bun when she's too lazy to do anything else".
This is not me. Not normally. Mind you, that doesn't mean that I'm one of those chicks who wears that expensive contouring makeup or anything. I've never been one to be that extremely girly, but at least I used to get dressed. I love my long skirts and my funky, hippy dresses. I love my skinny jeans and my understated shirts that somehow don't look too plain on me, the scarecrow of all scarecrows. I like that my hair has that wavy thing that my hairdresser says other women have to work for. I just don't use a hairbrush... (Maybe they should try that, hm? It's a heck of a lot cheaper than product, that's for sure.)
I've just become... Lazy. My worry? Now I've realized it and could totally fix it. But my husband is leaving in month for a year of Navy training. What's the point in getting dressed (outside of work, obviously) if he isn't going to be here?
My rational side has an answer for that: because it'll make you feel better, stupid.
That is true. However, I'm also worried about the fact that I'm probably going to be more depressed than I'm letting on while he's gone. My son won't know. My kids at school won't know. Shoot, my mom more than likely won't even know. I will though.
I'm really beginning to appreciate the women who've been living that lifestyle for years. I'm sure they survive by being way more social than I am. Just about the only person that I talk to on a regular basis is my husband.
That's another thing I have to start working on: being social. Ugh. I'm not so great at making friends. Working in customer service? I excel. Taking it beyond the initial conversation? Eh...
Oh, well. Things will progress the way they're supposed to, right? You have to have faith in that. Things will always happen the way they're meant to.
I'll end my tiny rant here. Hopefully in the future I'll get back to being myself so I can at least feel good about myself while Jarrett is gone. Otherwise I'll just be a big pile of pointless hobo.
As always, thanks for taking the time to read!
